Here's a typical night: Heave exhausted body into bed at 10pm, read until eyelids begin to droop. Just when I'm sure sleep is inevitable, turn out the light and spend 5 minutes arranging intricate combinations of pillows to counterbalance giant protruding belly, aching back, numb legs, and sore hips. Endure 10-15 minutes of prenatal dance party as baby rebels against the mere thought of sleep. Just when everything (and everyone) has calmed down and Mr. Sandman has been cleared for landing, that all too familiar feeling strikes: Bathroom time. 5 more minutes to disconnect from the pillow network, summon the strength to lift gigantic belly off the bed and trod off to the toilet, with sincere apologies to Thomas the Tank Engine for stepping on his head. Lather, rinse, and repeat the whole episode approximately 5 times throughout the night. And don't forget to throw in a few rounds of raging heartburn, a toddler who still occasionally cries out in the middle of the night, and a snoring cat and this is what it's like to "Rest up" these days!
I actually find myself looking forward to the sorts of sleepless nights that come with baby's arrival. Yes, I remember full well what those middle of the night nursing sessions are like, the seemingly endless diaper changes and the bouts of colic that only surface when the clock strikes midnight. But in my experience, that sleep deprivation served a purpose, whereas my current insomnia only serves to add baggage to my undereye suitcases and frustration to my mind. I find myself dreading bedtime and praying for the sun to rise. So while I greatly appreciate the advice, I'm going to hope that better rest is still to come... the kind that only comes when you finally get to hold that sweet child in your arms and truly understand what all the ruckus has been for. Then we'll start stocking up on rest in preparation for the teenage years.